the deformed democracy of 21st century (part 2)

I continue in the same context about the symptoms of social life today, according to the different concepts of democracy between people, and how they behave according to their understanding for this concept …..

The fact of the social life in several countries.

The economic circumstances is commanding in the social life of people and a lot of obstacles which prevent the progress are coming from the bad economic situation. The worldly system of wealth’s distribution isn’t fair enough for all people in every society, and the hole between rich and poor people broadens constantly.

When the rich people become richer, and the poor get more poverty, because they want only to avail so quickly in the real time and people think just in abstract benefits, regardless to the moralities. From this position; we are trying to take a moment to think about the life around us, people today almost forget why they gather the wealth in life? What’s the utility of having a big fortune in life when you can see people die because they can provide even a loaf to eat? How can these people taste the life without any iota of sense about others? Probably that everyone can find answers for himself by looking to the matter.

“me and after me the flood”…………   

The world is based on the benefits of people between each other, right, and nobody can provide a good livelihood for himself if others don’t need his work, his offers and his qualifications. That was the beginning of trade by the exchanging merchandises. So why we find a thought like : “me and after me the flood”, I mean : if I’m safe; I won’t care about others, and I won’t look back even if the flood comes on others I won’t care. So everyone thinks only in his own business, personal safety, it’s normal, but “regardless to other people whatever they’re”, I do my best to keep my benefits and I don’t look what probably happen to others (good or bad) even if I’m the reason for that but I won’t care, and there is the problem in the matter, the problem in the concept of democracy for this person.

We can’t blame anybody who takes this deformed concept in his mind, because the great powers in society and the authorities who make decisions in country, all of them forge this situation and made that as a lifestyle for society unfortunately. You can’t make the world going according to your wishes, because when you’ve the power to do it; you’ll bring many shakes on your environment (small or big)

It isn’t a platform to accuse the global system, but in fact people in everywhere suffer because of bad circumstances in life more and more, it’s a critical view on the existing system whereas we need to mention that and to lighten some aspects of this matter to see its importance on our concepts in life.

the deformed democracy of 21st century (part 1)

   Idiomatically the concept of democracy came from the Greek nation and created from two words with meaning of “the power of people” generally “power of the human”, but this concept was incomplete when the foreigners and slaves were excluded from the rule, and they haven’t the same rights like the citizens and the meaning exactly became “the power of liberated Greek citizens –only-“.

   The world today inherited the idea of democracy from the results of revolutions which changed the kingdom’s systems in Britain and France to legislative and popular nations (I mean the political systems). So the democracy is a feeling of dual appreciation for the human to himself and for the others in the same time, then it expanded on the entire world (to other nations). This feeling didn’t fixed with confines (unlimited), it was absolute liberation which made problems of falling down in the darkness of previous case before revolutions, this case brought several negative phenomenons which affect on the social, political, and economical life in nations.

   Because of the separation between the power “the state” and the religion “the faith ; the western nations today built their societies on tangible and economic goals in the life (worldly life only), that make people in hurry to earn more and obtain their personal interests, more of benefits, feeling of egotism, …etc.  “Whatever the means”         

   And we can see the monopoly of minority on the majority, then we get in result the citizen like a slave to his economic situation between the hands of powerful leaders, this is in the west. Although this material condition for life is controlled by governments in the east (guaranteed) but in counting on the individual freedoms.

   With time; these situations will create risks of destabilization of these societies in the near future because of there is no-means to keep the control in starting from the individual psychology even the social life of people (the soul of people together as a nation). And we’ll see the no-confidence increased, oriented liberty of speech, the monopoly, deception, avidity, stealing rights for private interest.

  The democracy (before practicing it) is a feeling of course of appreciation of the individual to himself as equal as to the others, then a system which guarantees certain conditions to provide the individual rights and social assurance in confines.

The path to reach the happiness (part 3/3)

   If you’re healthy person now, so you’re better than millions who can continue their lives because of sickness, if you’ve a house and your food in it, you’re better than many nations in the world who can’t get that for one day. If you’re safe, and you’ve not a war, you’re not living in mountains and forests because of battles, tortured or in jails, so you’re better than the half of the people in the world, let us gather these advantages together, and see how much you’re better than many many many of people.

   Remember that when you lose some things in your life and you can’t get them or had something then you lost it, for some reasons, remind always the axis of your life and your general social position, if someone lives forever in a castle and he doesn’t eat anything except the sweets and honey, this person won’t taste this honey, and he won’t feel how much is sweet this honey is he didn’t taste before the bitterness, like that you’ll have a reference to distinguish between the two different senses of taste. It’s the same in life, when you don’t feel the hardness of your efforts; you can’t taste the happiness after that. The sweetness is coming by the tiredness in doing something and working to realize your goals. We can understand the importance of a lot of things when we compare them with the worst cases.

                              The happiness comes through the giving, not taking.

   Search on the happiness By giving : you can’t find a diversity in opinions between philosophers and they agreed that the highest level of happiness comes through giving to others, and not through getting, (Maybe you give a money, maybe a science, maybe a help or advise, …etc) but you’ll feel happy after. And I give an example here, the writers work hard and for late times at nights to revise, write, correct and write again, only to get the final product, it’s very hard working really, it’s big tiredness, but in time where these writers receive the first copy of this book, they forget all pains or white nights, and all the previous tiredness disappears suddenly, they feel so happy in this moment because they succeed to give something for others, although the hardness of the road. Don’t insult everything you can give it, big or small, even a smile! (I talked in previous article about it “who are the best people”). It’ll reflect on you positively, so try to reach your happiness by giving and not always by talking only. Try a different way and preview your feelings after that regardless to the kind of this giving. You’ll be happy when you really enjoy what you’re doing.

   I resume now the matter from these articles and what I wanted to say: It isn’t logic to make your happiness depending on something you don’t have them yet. You should accept your circumstances and because it’s necessary to pass this way (this situation); don’t feel blue and don’t see everything dark, it’s a temporary storm in life you should enjoy it by the available advantages existing, always remember the positive side.

   Just one more thing; try to give a little from your time for others, offer the help if you can that and don’t wait the thank because your good feeling –after that- is your thank for yourself.

    I got this meaning from a poem, and I want to share it with you here:
“The happiness is coming from you, it doesn’t come from far, it’s coming from your mind, from your heart, and it doesn’t come by money,  so be happy by yourself (through your thoughts), and make your happiness by your convictions, or let the matter of happiness for the happy people.”

*This article (third part) is based on a lecture I watched it since 4 or 5 years ago, was talking about the happiness.

The path to reach the happiness (part 2/3)

    I said in the last time about the happiness, and I mentioned that it’s a decision we should do it, and the happiness we make it, and it doesn’t come in coincidences often.

   I heard one scientist talking in a lecture, and he talked about a long study which it made of many specialists to find the reasons of distinguishing and saying: if he’s a smart person or no, then he concluded this word:  “ the cleverness is the adaptation”. How can you adapt with your conditions and your environment in every time and in everywhere you’re.

   Many people got the sadness (the opposite of happiness) because they look at the problem (when there is) they focus on it and forget immediately all the positive things in the life (before getting this hard problem, or before failing to get something you wanted it).  I give a saying here: “one bird between your hands is better than 10 on the tree”, which means: don’t make your happiness relies on something you don’t have them yet, because maybe you won’t get anyone of them. it’s like living in dreams and I said before that it’s wrong in the life to live in imagination (previous article).

  That appears when you want to get something and you’ve a strong eagerness to realize it, but sometimes you can’t do, maybe it isn’t your true way, and your destiny is in other road (I talked in previous article about it). So your happiness should be relied on something you’ve them, not rely on something you wish to have them yet (live your moment !).

  The money was the important reason to make people sad and still until now (for people who haven’t it of course, they feel sad), in contrast; the rich people don’t have an absolute happiness, and maybe less, sometimes they’ve sadness more than the poor. Everyone who gets the livelihood without any effort until his month do you think he is happy? The problem is when you only see to the top and I can make difference between see (look at) / look for. When you look for, it means you’ve a target, and a plan to reach your destination, but when you only see (look at) you’ll got only the bad feelings (the sadness because you haven’t what other people have) when you compare yourself with someone is so far from you, you’ll have this bad feeling. Look at the top only when you think about developing your skills, your career in order to make models for yourself to get progress and development. We need to satisfy by our actual resources and conditions in life and just compare yourself with people near from your position now (if you want to achieve goals), we don’t stop improving to better because we’ve a plan for that, but enjoy your moments now by the available means between your hands, and why not if you can have better after a while. (Live your moment ! with good feeling).

   you’ll look below if you visit the orphan homes, or you go to the hospital, you’ll see the handicapped people there, diseases and illness for young, old, kids, …etc, you’ll understand the graces which you’ve now, you’ll see how much you’re lucky to be healthy, and you can measure this example on many parts in your life (work, personal life, your relationships, ..etc). You can feel happy because you look at people are less than your position now, therefore you feel happy that you’ve many things they haven’t them, you’ll see the several graces on you in the life. You still the same person, but you look differently now, right !!! There you can obtain a different feeling, it’s - of course - positive to make you happy.

   These are the 3 ways to compare yourself with others. And the modality is: when you just look at the people who have a social situation better than you, you got bad feelings from it, whatever when you look at the people with bad situations in their social life, you’ll see how many graces you’ve and of course you get good feelings from the meditation in your graces. And from all that we can deduce that the happiness is a trip and it isn’t a station. If you understand that, you’ll find the happiness in the road constantly when you’ve a purpose you feel of course happy regardless to your tiredness to obtain it. (Live your moment !  to have the good mood and positive power for living the next one).

   Be satisfied on your fate! (The last fate which you can't change it), you'll be the richest. I support the thought which says: the happiness is a decision we have to make it in the life, in the next article I’ll talk about another way to find your happiness.

the path to reach the happiness (part 1/3)

   7.3 billions of people in the world, you can’t find anybody among them who doesn’t want to be happy, all they want and have this purpose, so what can prevent us to be happy people? And why we can’t reach that every day?

   Nobody is excepted from bad conditions, and we all try to overcome them somehow, sometimes we succeed and some others not really.  And as we said already it’s an experience we learned it for the next days, but the hardest situation (in the life) is: when someone feels himself (herself) alone in the hard times. When no one can you rely on him (her).  If you’ve such as this situation I can understand what it means exactly, the people feel themselves with no value in the life in those time.

   One philosopher said: if the person is really: (the son of his parents, and of his environment, the son of his city , of his nation, …etc, if those are all true; so he’s absolutely the son of himself. Which means: your life is made of your thoughts and the result of your decisions, and everything concern you in this life is coming from your decisions. From this idea and the image below we’ll start our discussion.

Look at this picture, and let me see what your mind can tell you :

   In the picture you can see a cup of water (a known example in the world and I used to use it), and it’s (a half full / half empty), what's your choice? left or right ? Usually when someone is depressed, upset or disappointed ….etc, he uses the empty part and express like this : “I can see a cup of water, it’s half empty and it needs many to be filled“, when the person who has a good mood,  and optimistic emotions actually, the answer will be : “I can see a cup of water filled until the half, it’s not absolutely filled but I can see the water inside it.”

   It's depending to our views, and how we react with the environment around us, you’re surrounded with many conditions and your view isn’t the same if we change your mood or if we tell you bad news, it isn’t the same if you hear good news in the same position and event. I’ll tell you what’s better the first answer is “false”, so to tell the ½ filled is better than say ½ empty, which means:

   There are many things good, many advantages, many solutions, just you don't see them, and only see the empty part. You see the sadness, the negative part, the bad scenarios, ..etc. when you change the way which you see yourself, you find a lot of secrets inside you. This cup is a symbolic image for your satisfaction on yourself, and nobody has a full cup until the death of course.

  Maybe you agree with me now here in this point, and if you’ve a hard time in these days you say : “i wasn't always like this before. i don't know what came over me. usually i was strong. i wouldn't never give up but not on the contrary. “ so what happens recently ? what ‘s run with you in this time?

   Listen to me ! The life is like an exam. the obstacles aren’t to preventing us going ahead, but they are tests to make us stronger, and be ready for the next exams in the life, when you overcome something huge, you'll be stronger of course, and when you think “this test is bigger than your powers” (just it looks like that), but in fact it isn't, the difference is: if you give up from trying or not yet. And the saying says: “you don’t fail until you quit” (we talked about that previously).

   You mustn’t make your happiness relies on some wrong convictions you’ve them, and if you look differently to the matter, I mean to don’t rely your happiness on some reasons only because you think that they’ll be useful for your life, because many things look very important but in fact we’ll have a life better without them, and the inverse is correct too, now I want you ask your depths to get a clear answer,  can you look at yourself positively and discover your actual advantages, explore your abilities and all what you can do to pass this moment? Can you ? That let you see differently the life in front of you, and your acts will be surely different when you’ve the optimistic mood. The decreased self-confidence is one of reasons of the sadness. Have a sit please ! and look at yourself what you want exactly, want you to be happy ? (No one will answer “NO” of course), so what do you need more now, just decide to be happy, you shouldn’t wait to have that by luck, you need to decide how to be happy.

   It’s a truth what I’ll say now: Everyone has one advantage (at least) can make him someone special “featured person” in it. You must search about it, to shove your way toward the future.
  If you agree with me, be optimist, please ! Through trusting yourself, and believe that you can overcome all that, motivate yourself and try to increase your self-confidence, don't look at the near results, but the truth is in the end of road. And in the next article I’ll talk about some ways to find (recover) your happiness and continue your life ahead.

The planning separates between the real and unreal goals.

   I mentioned in a previous article, and I made difference between goals and dreams, maybe you spend several years and nothing you achieve at all, then you regret about it, and maybe you ask yourself what’s the problem with me that I can’t do anything, whereas some other can do? So in fact we’re in one from two cases “relaxing dreams” or “realistic dreams”, what Today we’ll talk about, is one (among many) widespread methods to plan for your goals.

   Firstly; the goal must be written on papers, and if you tell me that you know your goal, and they’re in your mind, so that doesn’t work. There are many methods to plan for personal goals or for organizations, like SWOT, POSEE, PMSP…etc. And to knowing more about these, you can check all the different ways.

  Secondly; The goal mustn’t be general (when you say for example: I want to be rich, or I want to lose 20 kilos of my weight, ..etc), because this kind of goals mean you’ll waste more of time, mean more of costs, more of tiredness, the  results are negligible, but the goal must be very specific. Therefore the most the most widely way used in these cases is S.M.A.R.T.

  S: Specific: the goal must be very specific and defined, so instead to say “I want to succeed”, or “I want to improve myself” you must specify in what exactly you want to succeed/ improve yourself? And say:” I want to improve myself in the computer’s skills.”

  M:Measurable: you can measure your goal periodically in order to know where you are now? And that let you see the obstacles which hamper your progress and compare the remaining (percentage with time) it’s good to know your steps in road to achieve your aim and make the necessary modification. The known rule says: “IF YOU CAN NOT MEASURE IT, YOU CAN NOT MANAGE IT”. And our goal becomes: “I want to improve myself in the computer’s skills through reading 10 books and Attend 2 training courses (internship).”
  A: Attainable / Agreed: in this step, we find a difference between the planning for personal goal, and planning for the goals of organization respectively.  Take your time for this planning and ask yourself how can you realize your goal? your qualifications, your means, and the agreement between “leaders of organization” about the details of this goal. (*Organization can be an association, a company, or a ministry, …etc.)

  R: Realistic: simply this part means that the good goal must be “difficult” & “possible”, and here I advise you to avoid the goals which aren’t compatible with your actual powers, skills, and resources. We continue in the same goal: “I want to improve myself in the computer’s skills through reading 10 books and Attend 2 training courses.” It’s a logical goal and not unreal, right !!.

  T: Timed: the goal has to be limited by time, the deadline to achieving your goal, because the opportunities become less when you the time is missing in the plan, and it becomes an opened goal (without confines), it isn’t important when you will realize it and it’s only a wish. The most important is the time of the end to compare with it. The same example becomes: “I want to improve myself in the computer’s skills through reading 4 books and Attend 2 training courses during 6 months.” You see!! And this is the final form of the goal.

    So in brief: the goal must be: Specific & Measurable & Realistic & Timed. If your goals aren’t compatible with these conditions, so you need to think again and plan from the beginning. And that’s what the sciences said.

If you want to make more details in your goal, when you plan for the available means to attain this goal, you follow the same previous steps S.M.A.R.T, and don’t forget to make a written plan for your goals.

the true value isn’t the same like we see (part 2).

   I said in the previous article how we evaluate some matter by wrong ways, it’s easy when we deal with things in our lives but it’s a little sensible with people. As I said before; what seems easy, it’s not in the reality, if we meditate well, we’ll find it as the resultant for many previous works you did them separately. Which means you should appreciate that and make it valuable too although you think that you got it easily. That appears clearly when the matter concerns the way of dealing with the nature. We don’t appreciate it as the same what it deserves, we don’t care seriously about it, therefore we start lose a lot from its features. You can understand what I mean now, right ! So take the same example on different matter in your life.

   People are different in their characters from good to bad, from calm to the arrogant, surely you experimented these in your life and you met from all kinds. When the person is humble, kind, friendly, you feel comfort with this person and your relationship can develop to be better and stronger.

  You find the suitable climate to strengthen this relation because the other side allowed that, and you don’t see it so important for you really. The way was easy to have this person in your life therefore you don’t present a good treatment, he (she) doesn’t get a huge interest from your side, usually you don’t care a lot about that. In the same time when your knowledge to this person took your interest (according to this person’s position in life), you did some efforts to strengthen the relation and you tire yourself to broaden it (usually that happens mutually), for some reasons, maybe a business gathered you in one way together, or work, or any interesting project in this worldly life. The both of you are cautious in every step to keep the nature of relation and let it's going normally, and the both of you see its importance (perhaps because of reciprocal benefits) with time you can see the fake goodness of some people around you and the true of others.

   When you see a person who forgives your mistakes, tolerant with everything you do it, don’t think that because of weakness of this person’s personality, he (she) did that willingly although there are many other reactions possible, he (she) preferred this doing for certain reasons, and not because he (she) is absurd.

   In brief: you respect somebody when you consider them care a lot of about your being with them, because they seem (and you think that) precious people, however; you don’t care about your doing or your reactions against the person who looks like easy to get (in your mind of course). And that happens often between friends.

   In the end, maybe you can’t see their true value (of these people) even you made them impatient with you and they leave you forever, there you feel what you really lose in your life. It’s precious to have these people in your life. Usually we don’t see the importance of these people starting from the family members even we lose them.

  The true value of every person appears when this person shows you his (her) respect and care every time (it’s a grace when you get care from others and they like you, appreciate your opinions, your advices). Many people haven’t what you have; only you don’t appreciate that. If you don’t see it, you’ll regret later when you don’t find these nice people by your side (neither the bad people who look for their benefits, nothing else).

  If you don’t think seriously to keep this grace – these precious people around you-, you’ll lose them, right, and perhaps you won’t get the chance to find like that companionship in all the next years of life.